its never "just friends"
2004-01-29 at 12:49 p.m.

a lot of stuff has happened in the last couple days. well...this guy that ive been friends w/ here in georgia for uhm 4 months kissed me. and he planned it so that he would kiss me when i wasnt paying attention or whatevah. i slapped him, of course. he told me he really wanted to be friends still and that he was sorry about all that, he just really likes me maybe even loves me and couldnt "hide it" anymore..uhm okay thats bullshit i think. how could he "love" me when we've only been friends. that to me is a major sign of being desperate and he needs to get his feelings straight. he knows i have a boyfriend and he told me he knew that after he kissed me. so it was completely planned.

rawrrawrrawr. this makes me angry/confused/worried/guilty. angry cuz he did that knowing i was going out w/ davey. confused cuz he is/was my bestest friend here. worried cuz of how davey prolly feels about this..and guilty because maybe if i was paying attention more this wouldnt have happened.

im so mad at him and more at myself :/ i wish this kinda stuff just wouldnt happen to me. and maybe it wouldnt if i was more "alert". i dunno...

i do know that i love davey w/ all my heart and i always will. i just hope he feels the same way as well...especially after all this.

the words i write are cheap and trite
but they're drawn on the back of your door.

old cuts xXx new wounds